Fiction from the world of
Lesbian Ninja Vampire Cheerleaders With Chainsaws Save the World From Zombies
By Bradley K. McDevitt
© 2013, Bradley K. McDevitt
Warning.. there is some evry NSFW language in this story.
Some nights, it doesn't pay to get out of bed, even if your bed is a luxury coffin large enough for two.
For example, nothing ruins your night quite like a horde of zombies, unless it is a horde of naked, horny zombies led by the twelve-foot tall demon with six penises, each the length of a man's arm, that had been assaulting female students and attempting to penetrate our campus' defenses for weeks now,
Yeah, definitely not a good start to my evening.
But a forty foot leap into the horde with my chainsaw going full-blast ruined a couple of the zombies' nights too. They might have been expecting an easy meal, but i had no intention of being easy prey. Besides, from the erections the demon was sporting, he had more in mind than serving me up as an entree, but i don't fly Male Airlines USA, and never have. He was still protected by a shitload of zombies though… time to fix that.
Rotten brains, blood, viscera and zombie cum splattered in all directions as I whipped he business end of my chainsaw through one from head to crotch, not-so neatly bisecting him. Not that i had time to admire my handiwork... five more zombies piled on top of me, forcing me to my knees as their teeth tried to tear into my flesh.
Uh, uh, baby... not gonna work! A second’s concentration to call upon the primal power of female vampirism, and my skin turned as tough as steel, well, at least as tough as aluminum. I could feel and hear teeth breaking when one tried to bite my left buttock and another, my arm. Moans of frustrated confusion turned to howls of fear as I flexed my muscles and thrust to my feet, flinging dead men in all directions, and unfortunately also shredding every miniscule bit of clothing I was wearing to rags.
As if it were not obvious what it wanted to do to me, the demon grew an extra few erections until its groin looked like an X-rated Hydra, with all its heads pointed right towards me, not that I was having any of that shit.
With all of Dean Lilith’s power flowing through me, I flung the chainsaw at the demon and tore into the nearest zombie with my bare hands, ripping its head right off its shoulders. I was pleased to see my chainsaw had hit and dug itself deep into the demon’s shoulder before jamming. Another zombie grabbed me in a bear hug from behind; it did not appreciate it when I broke its grip, and tore both its arms off at the shoulders in the doing.
Too many zombies. Even with all I had already killed—again-- I was not going to be able to get to the demon before one of the zombies got a lucky shot in, and I had no desire to end up zombie chow after only eighty years of enjoying my new existence.
Abandoning human form, I rose into the sky, flapping leathery wings furiously to gain enough height. The demon roared, trying to grab at me, but when you’re twelve feet tall and your target is the size of a bat, you don’t have much of a chance. At about a height equal to the Administration Building, the tallest building on campus at twelve stories, I figured I had enough altitude.
Snarling and baring my fangs, I reverted to human form right above the demon, summoning all my strength as I fell back towards the Earth. My transformation caught the demon off-guard, and I slammed into it from above with the force of a freight train.
The force of the impact drove it to its knees, giving me the few seconds opening I needed. The demon’s skull was thick, but not thick enough to keep me from ripping out its brain. It was a sizzling mass of corruption that burnt the flesh off my hands, but even a creature from Hell couldn’t live after I threw its brain three hundred feet into the air.
It was just about that time that the noise of my chainsaw brought a half-dozen of my fellow ninja to the fray and mopped up the rest of the zombies. As for myself, I headed back to my dorm room.
When I got there, the door was open and Dean Lilith was waiting for me.
Her voice was pure honey. “I got the report of how well you took care of that demon, Denyse. I am pleased. How are your hands?”
I showed her, and she tisked over the damage.
“We’ll have to do something about that…” I am not sure how the kiss she was giving me after that was supposed to fix my hands, but I was not complaining as we melted backwards into my coffin together. Somewhere along the line, she lost her clothing, and I was already naked from earlier. “You know, Denyse, I have been meaning to get to know you better..” she whispered as she lowered her open mouth to my waiting pussy.
Some nights, it does pay to get back in bed, especially if your bed is a luxury coffin large enough for two.